College essay

[BMC John Phillips III]

I recently signed up for an online college English Composition class. I figured with all the typing and writing I do on here, I might as well spread the wealth.

In keeping with that spirit, my first assignment was to write an essay based on Bob Greene's "The Cut." It's a story about several successful athletes that didn't make the cut in high school and how that motivated them to be successful. We were to relate that to an event in our lives. The best I could come up with was being passed up for leading SN at my first unit. Even though I tried to make my essay understandable by any audience, obviously it would easier to understand and relate to if you are in the CG. So rather than posting it and taking up more space that I already have, I will add it as an attachment and open the door for any criticism, comments or sea stories that you may have that relate to it.

thanks,

[SKC Raymond Kurtz]

Very good job, easy to read and a good life lesson.

[BMC John Phillips III]

Ray, thanks. I got an 80, I was told I should have dumbed it down, just not in those words. It was too military even though I tried to make it readible by non-military people.

[DCCS Todd Holcomb]

John,

Good read, I am taking an english course as well, through Thomas Edison State College. Man has it been a long time since I have done anything remotely associated with english in a educational type arena. My course is ENC 102 a research course, the research is very interesting but putting it all on paper and documenting it correctly well, let's just say I'm not Einstein. I'm about 3/4 done with my course. 2 more assignments and a final paper, hopefully I can stay afloat and pass. This is the last course for my ASAST (hopefully), then I'm off to start my bachelors. It's just so easy now with TA and CG foundation grants to pay for it, tack on the CLEPS and a person like me just might be able to complete my BSAST.

Anyway good luck and keep up the good work.
Todd

[BMC John Phillips III]

Todd, thanks for the feedback and taking the time to read my essay.

I am not big on excuses but with 10 of my 12 years in being afloat, I never really found time for college or any other type of schooling for that matter. Another reason I kinda waited to do anything like this is I figured I would be in the CG for 20 anyway and I didn't see a need to overburden myself when I was on cutters. Now that I am on land, I can't make those excuses. That and I figured as much as I read and post here I guess an english class wouldn't be so hard. Plus it might cut back on my post totals, I am venturing into BMCM Slesh territory ;)

I never imagined how easy it would be to use the tuition assistance and enroll in one of these online colleges. I am only taking one course this cycle, as I wasn't sure what I was getting into. But after the first week and a half and with only six and a half to go, I will likely sign up for two classes next time around.

Thanks again and good luck with your degree!

[GMCM Bill Wells (Ret)]

John,

Ray, thanks. I got an 80, I was told I should have dumbed it down, just not in those words. It was too military even though I tried to make it readible by non-military people.

This is a common problem. One rule to remember is to define your readership and their level of understanding. I have gotten into trouble over the years for overestimating the level of reading ability of some people.

Nautical terminology is always tricky. Although our language is rich with nautical terms few actually understand their meanings. With the upcoming political season take a look and listen the politicans use the term "by and large." They use it, as do many in the active Coast Guard, incorrectly.

A writer friend of my on nautical topics told me once that we know the difference between a port light and an air port. The public only knows porthole.

Here's an example where nautical language could raise some eyebrows, "The sailmaker used his pricker on the canvas."

Dumming down doesn't always work. Try explaining the term in a different way or not use it at all. Another thing, one of my former professors once visited England and during it arranged an interview with Agatha Christie. He pondered about what question he could ask that she had not been asked many time before. He settled upon this one, "Why are your early books more detailed than the latter?" A great question to which she replied, "I learned they [the readers] don't have to know everthing."

This is good advise especially for student papers.

[DCCS Todd Holcomb]

John,

How are you coming with the course? I finished with an A-, not sure how but I did. Anyway good luck as before and keep plugging away. Me, I'm waiting until after I transfer to start on the Bachelors.

Todd

[BMC John Phillips III]

Todd, I got an A, mostly because of the final essay which was worth 125 points and I got 125 pts on it. It was an argument and persuasion paper; I got the idea for the topic on this website!

I was signed up for a speech class until I read the syllabus and found out I had to video tape speeches in front of 5 adults. I could easily do that, but I didn't want to abuse my people or anyone else by making them listen to me any more than I already do :D Next class will likely be ENG Comp II, but I have a lot of classes that I still need so I am not 100% sure.

Congrats on your A (+ or - still equals 4 on your gpa).

[BMC K. Scott Kahle]

John,

Nice essay. I actually just finished the speech class to complete my AA degree. Recording and sending the video tapes in was not as bad as I thought it would have been.

Scott

[BMC John Phillips III]

Scott, congrats! I was actually enrolled in the speech class at Columbia online, but when I read that I had to video tape myself in front of an audience, I decided not to. The obvious first choice would have been my crew, but I didn't want to make this listen to me talk any more than I already do :p Was your class similar?

[ETC Joe Jester ret]

John,

Next time your invited to speak at the Chamber of Commerce, Lions Club, or other "civic" type events, that would be the ideal place to film your public speaking.

Another opportunity would be if you joined "Toastmasters".

[GMCM Bill Wells (Ret)]

Scott, congrats! I was actually enrolled in the speech class at Columbia online, but when I read that I had to video tape myself in front of an audience, I decided not to. The obvious first choice would have been my crew, but I didn't want to make this listen to me talk any more than I already do :p Was your class similar?

Being taped giving a talk before people used to be SOP for the instructor training classes.

[BMC K. Scott Kahle]

Thanks John. That is exactly how the class worked. I had to do two tapes/DVDs and each one had three speeeches on it. I did use some "volunteers" for the first tape and then used my family for the last one. It was not has bad as I thought it would be. I am glad the class is over though. It was more time consuming than most online classes.

Scott

[BMCS Dave Considine]

Scott - I like the Buffett quote. The one I used as an e-mail signature for a long time was

"Getting off of dry land always seems to help my equilibrium!"

Apologize for the off-topic post but this is a JP3 thread.

[ETC Cris A. Seybold]

JP,
Do it the easy way; look at your required annual training and video the the training session. Just be picky which trainings you give so that the speech isn't to filled with jargon that needs explaining.

[BMC John Phillips III]

"Getting off of dry land always seems to help my equilibrium!"

Apologize for the off-topic post but this is a JP3 thread.

Dave, that is a good quote and I will venture to say that "time has told that that quote is true" cause every time I get underway, I seem to have a better outlook on things. I should get underway every day.

As far as the thread going off topic, well that seems to happen to me a lot these days. I mean look at the discussion over on the 08 Warrant list is out thread. I didn't start that thread, but I tried to get it back on track....:rolleyes:

To all who gave great advice for the speech class, thanks. I think I will find an alternative means of satisfying that requirement for reasons Scott stated, I see it taking way too much of my time to do the video taping. There are other factors involved, but I do appreciate the discussion and suggestions! I think this fall I will try to knock out two sessions with two classes per (online). That should get me pretty close to where I want to be - if not there.

[MSTCS Dennis Noble (Ret.)]

What I have found most interesting about this thread and others dealing with education are the comments about how easy it is to get tution assistance. It is a far cry from my time and I am glad the U.S. Coast Guard has improved in this area. Is it as easy to get TA for classes taken at a regular college or university, rather than online? If so, then it really has improved. When I served I tried for close to 10 years to get TA but could not.

Bill Wells may have said this, but I think it is a good idea for anyone to take a good writing class. It is something that can help anyone and also help upon retirement.

Congrats to all who take the time and effort.

[BMC John Phillips III]

What I have found most interesting about this thread and others dealing with education are the comments about how easy it is to get tution assistance.

Dennis, I can't speak for everywhere, but at my sector, where we have a full time ESO and it is super-easy! I can't imagine it being that much harder anywhere else, it's more of a matter of how much effort the member is willing to put in.

[BMCM Deane Smith]

What I have found most interesting about this thread and others dealing with education are the comments about how easy it is to get tution assistance. It is a far cry from my time and I am glad the U.S. Coast Guard has improved in this area. Is it as easy to get TA for classes taken at a regular college or university, rather than online? If so, then it really has improved. When I served I tried for close to 10 years to get TA but could not.


Dennis...TA is very easy (and quick) now. I faxed in a request at the beginning of the month for 2 classes and I got the approval back 24 hours later. They say it could take up to 14 days to process, but it's typically a much quicker turnaround.

All ESO duties have greatly improved over the past few years. From TA processing to library units...they do a great job.

[MSTCS Dennis Noble (Ret.)]

From the responses to my comment, I applaud the USCG for improving the TA and educational benefits. It is nice to hear.

Perhaps they never gave me any because they knew I would probably use up all the funds.